Friday, May 30, 2008

Concerns of an over protective Mom.

I need to figure out how to teach the boy how to deal with a feeling I don't fully understand. He says that things get to be "Too much." sometimes at school, or when playing with other kids. The noise they make, the way they touch him, and not wanting to play the same games they do. The way he talks about it, it sounds like it builds up and doesn't go away for a long time. Sometimes it's still there from the day before. WE need to figure out a release for him that doesn't involve hitting or screaming.

He has always been fairly easy going. He wouldn't fight back when the cousins in California (Howard's side of the family) would hit him or take the toy he was playing with. He would just move away and do something else. He took the move back to Oregon with little problem. Not long after we got here he started screaming when he didn't get his way, or when he thought he was getting in trouble. Not every time, but often enough that we all noticed it. Maybe that was his age and lack of language to explain how he was feeling, or maybe it was the start of these problems. When we stayed with my niece, he didn't do anything for weeks when her son would bite him. But he finally had enough and began to pinch and sometimes scratch him to stop him from biting. It took less time at school for him to start to push or hit kids that pushed or hit him first.

As far as I can tell the other kids are often the first ones to hit, however I know that he probably has done something else that provokes it. I don't think The Boy means to treat others in a way that would cause others to hit or push him, but he still has trouble with personal space, and he drools quite a bit, which make people uncomfortable. I think he is sometimes too rough with what he thinks are nice touches.

I need to figure out how to teach him about personal space, and how to keep his mouth dry. We need to work on what to do instead of pushing or hitting someone who is irritating him, whether it's hitting, pushing or just bugging him. He is a good kid most of the time.

Any ideas? Anything that has worked with other kids, or things that have helped you control your negative feelings? I could use all the help I can get. Thanks

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