Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Random thoughts

Well, today I've been looking into some Work from Home things. I'm not sure what I'd like to do, but It sounds interesting.
Aidan is being very stubborn lately, he goes back to doing what ever I've just told him to stop doing. I can move him away and try to distract him but now he remembers for longer and will go back just as fast as he can.
The weather has been too hot to do much of anything during the day. Our air-conditioner doesn't work very well.
I'm sleepy all the time. I'm getting headaches much more often than normal. Howard thinks it's because of my allergies.
We may be getting some help with weatherising this place, which means new doors and any broken or cracked windows will be replaced, I might get an air-conditioner, and maybe even a stove because the one I have has a cracked top.
I haven't done anything creative lately, no scrapbooking, no art, no knitting, no anything. I hope that will change when the weather cools down some.
I have to get some laundry done tonight, at least one load, maybe two.

Monday, June 28, 2004

Another Monday

I keep posting these happy thoughts, or things I'm grateful for posts on Mondays because I need to be reminded that in the middle of all the usually stuff there are some things I am very happy about.

Having a healthy family.
Friends I can call if I need them.
Enough food.
My wonderful little boy.
My fantastic older sons.
A husband that loves me even when I feel un-lovable.
Hugs and kisses.
Naps.
No dishes in the sink.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Tables and chairs and Mommy frustration.

Aidan has learned to climb up on our living room chairs, from there he will then crawl out onto the tables. Sometimes he stands up to reach things that are put up so he can't get them. I wish I could get him to stop. I hate having to say "No" all the time. So I pick him up and put him on the floor telling him "Stay off the table." He knows it's not a good thing, because sometimes he will look at me and back off the table on his own. I've tried to make sure that while he is doing something "good" I notice and let him know that it's good, I try not to yell, or make a big deal about it, but I'm not sure how well I'm doing. Oh, and he has learned how to scream when he is frustrated. It's that high pitched, shrill shriek that only babies and toddlers can make. I can normally ignore it for the most part, after I'm sure he isn't stuck and might get hurt. But the last couple of days I've had some really bad headaches, and those shrieks are truly painful.

On the bright side, Aidan is learning how to pretend now. And he is giving kisses with his mouth closed now. He started to go around the corner and then peek around at me and laugh the other day. It's really cute. When he sees his Daddy, he says "Hiya!" And the smile on his face makes it obvious that he is happy that his Daddy is home. I hardly ever go anywhere with out him so I don't get that kind of welcome often. It's amazing to me how much I love this little guy. Which both makes the frustration easier and compounds it.

He is walking more than crawling these days, which is good. He still seems to be behind with talking and such things. He knows where his tummy is, but won't point to it. He won't follow directions, very often. But being behind a little in some places isn't so bad, because he is making progress. He does do some things that I don't think he supposed to do yet. For example he points with one finger intentionally, and he whispers. I think around 2 they are supposed to point, but I'm not sure of the whisper thing. He is still a little big for his age, and is in wonderful health. Very few colds and only one stomach virus, plus that one virus with the spots. He love music, almost any music. He dances and claps his hands.

Monday, June 21, 2004

Aidan and Buddy

Aidan and Buddy out in our yard. I wish we had the fence up so that Buddy could be off his chain, I think they will have lots of fun together.


A boy and his dog. Posted by Hello

Monday again.

A few things in my life that I'm happy about or grateful for.

Aidan and his beautiful smile.
Our own home, with which we can do whatever we want.
Good food to eat, and the ability to create good meals with it.
The chance to watch Aidan as he grows and learns.
My healthy happy family.
My grandson has wonderful loving parents, and many other people who love him and teach him.
Friends.
My husband and friend, Howard.

Sunday, June 20, 2004

Rasing Boys

This poem was posted on my "Raising all boys" message board. I liked it, and I hope you do too.

Rasing Boys
by Roberta I. Teage

I scrub the wall of fingerprints,
Pick up the mounds of clothes.
I sweep the dirt that shoes track in-
Wish I could use a hose!

Meals are served from dawn to dark,
Dirty dishes crowd the sink.
Just when they're washed and put away-
Everyone wants a drink!

The washer pulls the dirty grime
From pants worn thin and patched.
They look so very neat and clean-
Yuck, look what the pockets hatched!

Broken bones and bloody knees,
I should have been a nurse.
I take it all in shaky stride-
Just grateful it's not worse!

Screams and shouts and arguments
Test the keeping of my cool.
They left the neighbor's faucet on-
See their new front yard pool!

A soothing bath is ecstasy,
A reward at the end of my rope.
Raising boys isn't really bad-
But first I must wash the soap!

A rose can say I Love You,
Orchids can enthrall;
But a weed bouquet in a chubby fist,
Oh my, that says it all!

Friday, June 18, 2004

Buddy


Our dog, we are not sure what kind of dog he is but he is so sweet. Posted by Hello

Baby Sumo.


Aidan 6/2003 Posted by Hello

Distance

Today I'm feeling the distance between me and those I love. I miss my Mom and Dad, and Mark. Xander is growing up so fast,so is Elijah , and I'm missing all of it. I'm feeling disconnected from my friends, because all of them are far away. My adorable Aidan is a big help with keeping my spirits up. And of course Howard is doing his best to be supportive and helpful. I guess I'm just a bit hormonal right now and so my emotions are more volatile. Jennifer and Nicole, I love you guys and I miss you very very much, kiss your boys for me please.

Thursday, June 17, 2004

First Post Surgery Check-up.

Today Aidan had his first post surgery check-up. The Doctor said that every thing looks good, he would like to see him again in 6 months to make sure that the testicle stays in place. They weighed him and measured him of course, he's 27 pounds and 4 ounces and 33.5 inches tall. That's an increase of 4 ounces and 1.5 inches since the surgery!

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Belated Positives

Otter pops.
Tall glasses of iced water or tea.
Message board to discuss baby raising things.
Finally finding that Callanetics tape, even though I am so out of shape I can't even get through all of it.
Rock'n Dino!
Learning how to post pictures to my blog. (Sorry everyone, you will have to suffer through several pictures of Aidan until I get used to this feature. LOL)

Saturday, June 12, 2004

Aidan playing outside.


Aidan loves to play outside, but the grass tickles his feet. Posted by Hello

Secret Service

In my dream I was working for someone who had Secret Service men assigned to them. Aidan and I lived in a house with this man, and somehow I was a working mom and a stay at home mom. I left Aidan with his Secret Service Lady, who seemed more like a Nanny than anything. She took him shopping for new cloths and shoes. There was a little girl about the same age as Aidan who also lived in the house with us. Across the street was a Mall. The neighbor kids had stolen Aidans new shoes, and the shoes the little girl had gotten as well. We tried to get them to bring them back, we threatened to put them in jail, I told them I'd have the Secret Service guy, assigned to me, "get it out of" them. They never did bring back the shoes. We decided they had probably taken them to the Mall to sell them. Later I was meeting some important people. Three men and a woman. Just after shaking hands with the last man, Aidan came running out of the house with his arms out. Everyone put their arms out for a hug, but Aidan ignored all the men, almost went to the lady, but ultimately ran into my arms. Everyone smiled at him and we got back to business. Aidan just listened to us talking as I held him.

Friday, June 11, 2004

A picture of Aidan.

I'm testing Hello for shareing photos. This picture was taken May 1, 2004.


No autographs today. Posted by Hello

Picture of Aidan walking.

For some reason pictures taken in the house with our digital camera are usually a little out of focus. Those taken outside are quite a bit clearer. This picture was taken today.


I'm walking! Posted by Hello

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

Last nights Dream.

I was involved in a child custody case, but not with Howard and not with Dawn. It seems like it might have been the government or some secret society who wanted my children for something. Kind of like the kid in "Star Man" the TV series, they wanted to study them or the kids had some super powers or something. Part of the time I was being chased by these 3 people, 2 men and 1 woman, the rest of the time they were just following me. I wasn't scared, it was fun an intellectual competition of sorts. At one point I got away from them at a gas station by not pulling my pants up. (why my pants were down isn't clear.)That was one of the times they were chasing me. I just barely squeaked by them. Later I went into an expensive restaurant, they were just following me. I got a table and ordered a Prime Rib dinner. They took a table near me and also ordered dinner. I got up to go to the restroom, the woman did as well, but while she was in her stall, I left. Stopping my waitress as she was taking my dinner to the table I asked her to put it in a bag, paid and left before the people following me found out.

At some point I became aware that there was another woman in the same situation as I was in. And we joined forces to save our children. We weren't worried that our children weren't with us, which now seems strange. We came up with a plan to get rid of the followers forever. We would file a complaint of harassment against them and have them arrested. Then while they were busy with that, we would sell our cars at one dealer then buy another an a dealer down the street. We would have to loose weight, and even bought some noodle dishes which would help with that. In fact it seems like we were planning on loosing the weight in just a couple of days rather than months. We would then find a town on the coast where neither of us knew anyone, somewhere no one would think to look for us and get a house together, dye our hair and raise our children in safety. We put the plan in motion by loosing them momentarily by taking a sharp left at a fork in the road. We found a policeman and he promised to take them in for questioning. At that point I woke up and so never discovered where the children were.

Monday, June 07, 2004

Positives for this week ...

The sky is an incredible shade of blue today, not a cloud to be seen.
The temp shouldn't reach 90 today.
The look of joy on Aidan's face when he sees Howard coming home.
Friends to chat with.
Watching Aidan figure out something new.
Hugs and kisses.
Having some of the things I enjoy available when I want them.
Spell checker to help me remember how to spell.

Sunday, June 06, 2004

Aidans newest habits.

Lately Aidan has been hugging people on the top of their heads, I'm not sure what that is all about but it's cute. :) He has also decided to walk for 5 or 6 steps at a time now. He's very steady and it seems to be pretty easy for him, but I guess he still thinks he can get there faster if he crawls. I'm sure he will get to it sooner or later. He as also started to bite, just a little nip when he is hugging someone. Sometimes it's on the nose other times it's the shoulder or knee whatever is closest during a hug. It's usually not very hard, and usually just the cloths, if there are any. I have stared to tell him one time, "Don't bite!" and if he does it again I put him down away from me. Of course if he comes back to me for more hugs and kisses I pick him up until he bites again. I hope he gets the idea that biting isn't a good thing. I'm not really sure that he know he is doing it. He has started to "play" with his toys now, he seems to be pretending when he plays with his stuffed animals, not just hugging them or throwing them like he used to. He has been playing with cars and with phones for some time now, but neither in a "normal" way. Now he drives the cars around and pretends to talk on the phone. He loves any music and will stop whatever he is doing to listen and sometimes dance to whatever music is on.

Thursday, June 03, 2004

Dreaming

I am with a couple of men, we are a team of ... reporters? We are going to see a woman who was famous and has turned in to a recluse. She reminded me or Betty Davis. Anyway she had a snow and ice covered pond across her drive way, which you have to drive really fast to get across. Then there is a ditch you have to jump over, also filled with snow and ice, with a sprinkler (the type with 4 tubes with holes in them that spin around in a circle) which sprays more snow and ice over where you have to jump. The two men do it with much laughter, and I know I have to do it too, if only to show them that I can. But somehow I slip into the ditch behind me and end up in her living room. She laughs at me, but it is a friendly kind of laugh.

Later the two men and I are going through several storage areas, there are many strange things, all kind of vague in my memory. Then things change just a little bit, and we are in a hospital type place, or maybe a make shift triage area. There are lots of babies laying on tables. I am standing near a table with 6 babies, all of whom still have their umbilical cords attached, some have a placenta as well, as if they were just born and laid on the table with no other attention paid to them. One of them, a boy, was moving around, kicking and swinging his arms until he feel off the table. I picked him up, at first I tried to use a blanket or something to keep the blood and other birthing fluid off of my cloths, but then decided that the baby was more important. I looked down at his face. His eyes were closed, his features were soft and sweet, like a mothers dream of the perfect baby. Then he opened his eyes. They had no pupil, there was a ring of color, blue in the right eye and red in the left, which streaked toward where the pupil should have been.

Minor problems with my comments.

I have been unable to post a comment to my blog for a couple of hours today. So I thought I'd comment here, because I might forget later. To Working Mom
You are completely correct that working Moms are working all the time too. In fact I think they have it harder most of the time than Stay at home Moms. For the reasons you mention mainly. For example, when I was working while Allen and Chris were younger, I worked my 8 hours, picked up the kids, cooked dinner, cleaned house, made sure the kids took baths, and did their homework. All the things I do now, but in only 4 hours before going to bed for a short 7 hours of sleep. I am not sure I could do it now. :) I've also done the single parent thing. And you are again correct, it is very difficult. I am very proud of good single parents, such as yourself.

And to Jodie, first thank you for stopping by and for your comment. I do love staying at home with Aidan. I don't know how long I'll be able to do it, but so far it's working out for us. I'm kind of conflicted about it. Half of me wants to get out and work, and use my education. I'd like to meet people other than my husbands family, and working out side the home is a good way to do that. On the other hand, I worry about day care for him. We don't have anyone here that I'd want to babysit for us, and I've heard so many horror stories about daycare. I'd miss so much of his life. This part of me was made to be a Mom, cooking, sewing, and other old fashoned home maker skills. I agree with you that Moms, whether or not they work out side the home or not, "Anyone who can be a mom and manage a clean house without outside help is a miracle worker."

Thanks to both of you for your comments. Come back again, and comment all you like.

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

What does "stay at home mom" mean to you?

To some people it means someone who is available all day, every day, to run errands, play chauffeur, what have you. They also think that your house should be perfectly clean all the time, because you have all day to do it. They forget or don't know that kids need attention all the time, and the house gets messier when people are home all day than it does when no one is there. I'd rather sit with Aidan and read to him than clean anyway. LOL

Today I took Howards cousin-in-law to pay her bills. Because she is almost blind and can't take herself, and she can't use checks "Because I get too confused", her husband hurt his back yesterday and couldn't take her. I love them, don't get me wrong, and they have done a lot for us since we moved here. So I spent 4.5 hours driving her around. Aidan missed his morning nap, and was late for his afternoon nap. So I have a grumpy, whiney boy on my hands this afternoon. I know that I could say no, but it's hard for me. I'm working on the door mat thing, but ... I'm not doing very well at it right now. I'm also grouchy because it's hot, and I have a headache. So I'm venting. Forgive me if I offended you. But remember, most stay at home Moms are pretty busy. Most of them will probably love to help you if you give them enough notice, and are aware that pre-schoolers need naps, so keep it short.

Tuesday, June 01, 2004

It's not Monday but ...

Positives for this week ...

Aidan's hugs and kisses. (He has started to hug the top of my head.)
A water sprinkler that works.
Extra money to buy a few extra goodies.
Having the bills paid up for the first time in 3 months.
A swimming pool we can play in.
Snowanna is having a boy, they think they will name him David Michael.
Mark and Eileen have set the date.
Air conditioning.
My family and the love we share.
My family by choice (Jennifer, Elijah, Nicole, Cheryl)