Saturday, December 30, 2006
I talked to Howard on the way home, he sort of tried to convince me he felt bad for me. I was willing to go along with it until he said "Now you know what I go through every day." Huh? He may walk most of the way to work most days, but he doesn't have a preschooler with him. He doesn't have to worry if the little one is getting too cold, if that cough is because of the weather or because he is getting sick, he doesn't have to listen to a young boy scream and wonder if someone will call the police thinking I'm stealing him or hurting him some how, and even if he did he wouldn't have as much to worry about since he is the biological father, and I'm only the step-Mom. I know it's really hard for him, I know he gets cold and tired and it seems like forever just to go couple yards. I wish I could do something to make it easier for him, but it's not the same. I'm not saying it was worse for me, because I didn't have to go all that far.
I don't really want a car right now. It's strange, I've always had a car or something available to get around. I thought I'd feel lost but I really only miss it when I want to get a major grocery shopping done, or wanted to get a large toy for Aidan that couldn't be easily carried on a bus. I have to work on feeling comfortable asking for a ride or saving up money for a taxi or something. I don't miss paying for gas, insurance and the usual up keep. I also need to walk, it will help with the weight loss and I need to get in better shape. (I just don't want to walk as much as I did today, in the cold with Aidan.)
Well, enough feeling sorry for myself. I probably won't post until after New Years Day, so I want to wish you a Happy New Year. I hope you have a good time what ever you do. I'll be home alone, well as alone as I can be with Aidan in the apartment, watching whatever I can find interesting on the tube. No big party for me, but you know what? I'm perfectly happy with that. Peace and love.
Friday, December 22, 2006
To tell you the truth I'm feeling rather disappointed about the Holidays this year. I won't be getting the big family Christmas at Mom's like I'd dreamt about while in California. Howard has to work on Christmas Eve, so we will be home, just the three of us. Well it might be 4 if David doesn't go to his friends house for Christmas. We will have a nice dinner because Howard will have Christmas day off. We will open presents in the morning and watch Aidan play.
For some reason I'm feeling kind of depressed. That is odd for me because I never get depressed, a little down or blue perhaps, but this is more than that. I'm also overly emotional about everything. Maybe it's just the fact that so many things seem to be either going badly or not happening at all.
1) Howard has to walk, hitch-hike and or catch a ride with people he works with, just to get to work.
2) Aidan has started this screaming thing. He screams for no reason at all, or because he didn't get what he wanted, or because I asked him to do something, or because I want him to ask please. He will scream even when he knows he will get in trouble for it.
3) David hasn't found work yet, which means that we have to cover all the rent and most of the bills. He thinks he can get the electric and gas bills taken care of.
4) I'm getting more headaches than I used to. Some of them are migraines, some of them are stress headaches, and some are sinus related.
5) I REALLY wanted this Christmas to be special for Aidan. It's the first one where he will actually understand what is happening. But without a car we didn't get a tree. Mom thought she could get us one, a fake one, for free, but that doesn't look good, and she isn't going to be here until Saturday anyway. No decorations, things cost more than I expected so I couldn't get what I wanted for Aidan, besides I couldn't have gotten it home on the bus.
But I am home at least. I'm back in Oregon where I feel connected. I do get to see my family, and I get to see my friends. Maybe after all this Holiday stuff, and the Aidan's birthday, maybe then I'll feel better.
Friday, December 15, 2006
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
This was Aidan's first snow ever. He was instantly in love with it. He loved watching it, making snowballs, even the tiny little snowmen I made.
Aidan and Howard went walking in the field behind the apartments. It was still snowing, Aidan was amazed with the falling snowflakes. They got ahead of me so I took this picture of them.
Aidan got a holiday gift a little early. We were looking for a rug at the Goodwill by the pound store, and he found one of those Fisher Price race car beds. It was only $20! It has all the parts and a Baby Sealy mattress. The only problem is that it's a Toddler bed rather than a Twin, but he is SO in love with it that it's worth it.
I'll be doing the rest of my shopping after the 15th. After we pay the phone bill and the computer payment, the rest of Howard's pay check will be available for gifts. I'm not sure what Aidan will get for DJ. Cars, trucks, planes? Little People things to go with what he got for his birthday? I'm thinking about getting only a few pictures taken at Picture People (They cost a lot, but we get them the same day), and give my parents a frame with them in there, of course some for me too. Mom came out and asked for pictures if we can get them, so I guess that will be best. I want to get something of Snowanna and Craig too, but I'm not sure what. I don't want to get baby stuff, because I think a lot of people will be doing that, maybe they would like some pictures too? Hmmm maybe not ... Gift certificate? I'll think of something. I accept suggestions, if you have any. :)
I think I'm finally getting over this head cold, today I'm not coughing as much and my throat doesn't hurt. It will be great to feel normal again.
Sunday, December 03, 2006
I finally have something to show myself that I'm actually looseing weight. Several months ago my Mom gave me a pair of jeans, when I tried them on I could almost button them but not quiet and zipping them was out of the question. Even laying on the bed didn't help. Last week I tried them on again, I finally could button them! Still couldn't quiet get the zipper up though. Yesterday I tried them on again, and I can zip them! I can't eat, or breath very deeply in them, but I can actually wear them! They are 4 sizes smaller than the other jeans I have, luckly I have another pair that are only 1 size bigger than the "skinny" ones, so I'm able to wear jeans that I can breath in but won't fall off if given the right encouragement. LOL
I'm not sure how to address this next issue. Maybe it deserves an entry of it's own, but I'm not sure I want to write about it at all. It's been bugging me for a long time, so I think I'd better get it out so that maybe I can let it go. Here goes: It seems to me that my kids are never given the benefit of the doubt by the rest of the family. Excuses are made for everyone else, but none are ever accepted when it's my kids. For example; Years ago my Neice, about 6 at the time, said that Allen,about 11, held her down in a car and laid on top of her. They both had their cloths on, he didn't touch her except to lay on her, but it was suggested that he had somehow molested her. There was never a question of whether or not she had misunderstood what he said, or why he was doing what he did. It later turned out to be him trying to protect her from some neighborhood bullies. When my brother Mark took Allen to the movies one time, at a drive in, Allen told my Mom that Mark opened his pants and asked him to touch him there. Right away Mom thought that Allen must have been mistaken, he didn't hear Mark right, or he was dreaming. Another example of my kids getting the short end of things happened over Thanksgiving. We had a big dinner at Snowanna's. Almost all of my family were there. (Howard, Christopher, Allen and Xander were not there) DJ was playing on this little foam kiddy couch, Aidan wanted to play too. DJ was told to tell Aidan to get away if he didn't want to play with him. He told Aidan to get away, and Aidan did. Then Aidan climbed up into a chair, DJ must have decided not to let Aidan sit there either because he bit Aidan really hard on his lower back. My Mom said something like "Well, he should leave DJ alone when asked." Jessica was quick to jump to Aidan's defence and said "He did, he got up when DJ told him to and was trying to get in the chair when DJ bit him." My Mom agreed that that was what happened, but didn't say anything to DJ about biting, she didn't comfort Aidan, or in anyway acted as if DJ had done anything wrong. Snowanna was busy, as was Craig, so DJ got away with biting Aidan. Am I being too sensitive? Am I holding on to old resentments that should be forgotten? Any suggestions on how I should handle this kind of thing if it happens in the future?
Friday, December 01, 2006
Happy Birthday! I hope that your birthday is a good one. I miss you and love you very much. I wish I could be there with you for your birthday, but I just can't make it. Maybe one day I'll be able to come out there, will you show me around? Give your Mom a hug for me okay?
Being sick has delayed getting some things done. When talking sends you into a coughing fit you don't make many phone calls. I have to call about Aidan getting into pre-school. If I take too much longer I'll have to wait until January to do it. I'd like to have it taken care of as soon as possible. We will see.
Monday, November 20, 2006
So now I'll be able to get Aidan into a pre-school and daycare, I'll start looking for temp. work, and I can stop stressing over finding a place to live. Plus I get to save about $300 over what I'd pay for a 2 bedroom almost anywhere in Salem. The place we are moving into is $450 which is a little low for the area, but I like it.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Friday, November 03, 2006
Sunday, September 10, 2006
My first "real" boyfriend was Carlos Rosencrans Jr., he was a Junior at Gadsden High School the year I was a Freshman. He was sweet and made me feel special. My family moved hundreds of miles away during the Winter break that year, and I never saw him again. He probably never thinks of me, if he remembers me at all. But he was important to me.
The first boyfriend to "cheat" on me was Bill Brant. We saw each other for about a year, I wasn't allowed to date yet though so we didn't really get to do much. I had a girl friend, who had just transferred to our school, I can't remember how I knew her before that but I did. Anyway, one day she and I were talking and she started to tell me about her new boyfriend, and mentioned that his name was Bill. We quickly figured out that he was "going" with both of us at the same time. So we gave him a choice, "Her or me." He chose her. No big deal really, he didn't have much ambition or direction in his life, we were headed toward a break up anyway. A few days later, she gave him a box of chocolate chip cookies and broke up with him. He called me and asked if I'd take him back! I didn't, and he discovered that the cookies had ex-lax chocolate in them. From him I learn caution when giving my heart.
There were boys in High School that I liked, some that I had crushes on, and a few that thought I loved. But until I met Don Weber, through the CB radio, I hadn't really dated much. Eventually we started to have sex, the first time in the back seat of a car on a double date! (It was rather ... non-exciting, almost boring) Don and I were married in December 1977, I had just turned 18 that October, and he was just short of 21. The marriage was rocky, and full of emotional and occasionally sexual abuse. But I got my 2 oldest sons out of the deal, and for that I'm grateful. From him I learned that I can take care of myself and be just fine without a man, if I choose to.
Dannan Tavona-Riley was one of my best friends, and helped me through my divorce from Don and eventually we became lovers. We were married about 4 months after my divorce became final. We had some really wonderful times, but he eventually decided that he couldn't handle the tough situations that came up with my kids any more and after 11 years he decided to leave me. From him I learned that "I" have worth, outside of my children. That I'm intelligent, and that even a good thing can end.
This may sound a little slutty to some of you, but I had another relationship while Dannan and I were married. We had an open relationship, we believe in polyamory (loving more than one person at a time) and it had nothing to do with the end of our relationship. Anyway, Jeff Gill was the love that I never really had. I know that I loved him a lot more than he loved me, if he ever really loved me at all. It wasn't just sex either, we spent a lot of time together going to SCA events, people there thought we were married to each other! I enjoyed talking to him, and just being in his company. But eventually he found a woman he wanted to marry. She told me that I was the only woman she worried could mess up their marriage. Things happened, and he decided that his relationship with her was more important. I haven't seen or heard from him in about 4 years, I hope he is happy. From him I learned that love can not conquer all.
Howard McMillen and I have been together since May 1998, when we met and it was lust at first sight. Things grew from there as we spent more and more time together, eventually he officially moved into my apartment with me, and on May 1, 2000 we were married. If you have read my blog for a while you already know some of the how and why of our relationship. So far so good.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
I'm trying out the newest version of Blogger. So far it is easier to use than the older version, I think it will be better especially for people new to this kind of stuff.
Not much is happening here. Trying to get things taken care of so that I can move down to Grand Ronde as soon as possible. We still don't know about that mobile home, I guess it will be this week-end or something like that before Howard can see it. I really really hope that it's a nice place, and that we can move into it over the week-end. I know that it might be a few days more than that before we can move, I have to get the travel permit for the truck and such, plus gas. So I'll need something like $100 to get it all taken care of, but then ... there will be nothing stopping me.
So far none of the jobs I've applied for have come through. I'm sort of glad though, because I'd rather look closer to where we are going to live than Salem, if there is anything that is. Besides I'd have to move right now in order to be there for the first day of school. I think school starts on September 5th this year. So this gives me some time to relax.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
I'm a bit upset with Howard right now anyway, he's mad because I had to bring Dad's car back and so I can't take him to work any more. Which means that he either has to find a car pool, or walk on the days that Snowanna can't take him. So, according to him, I'm not doing everything I can to get the car for a while longer. But it's the only car that is reliable around here, Mom's car will just decide not to start for no reason, and his little truck is getting old. They don't want this car to get worn out driving all that way all the time. I can't blame them, but I wish things were different. I know that I'm not the one walking 46 miles one way everyday, but there isn't much I can do right now.
Anyway, I don't know how long I'll be here. I need gas money to get down there with the truck, and if this house thing is real and comes through next week-end we will be moving anyway so ... I just don't know. Oh well, eventually everything will work out, it's just hard waiting for it.
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Aidan was seen by another EI specialist, she says that he is behind in a few areas, but ahead in a few others. If I'm back in Hood River next week, August 31 in fact, they both want to see him. And we will talk about what he needs. I'll then have the paper work for who ever handles that where ever we end up.
Sunday, August 13, 2006
That's was the extreme among the people I was talking to, but there were stories of people who gave up things they once enjoyed, and then stated that they had never liked them. Or people who started to watch sports when before their relationship they avoided watching them. I think the strangest part about that is that they all seem to think that they always liked or disliked what ever it was, or they always believed such and such when in fact they didn't before getting involved with their newest boyfriend/girlfriend.
Maybe we all make little changes to our attitude, our outlook on life, and our likes and dislikes in order to suit our new love. I hope that those changes aren't enough to cause friends to give up on me/ you/ us.
On the topic of relationships, what do you think of someone who encourages their lover to behave in a certain fashion but then turns their back on them because it no longer fulfills their needs? How much time should you give someone to ... become more responsible with money for instance, before you decide they aren't going to change enough for you to work it out? And how much responsibility should you take yourself if you used to encourage spending money rather than saving it, for long enough that it became habit in your lover? Are we even responsible for the changes we encouraged in our lovers?
As you can see, I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I've tried to look at my past relationships and see if I changed for them, or if they changed for me or both. It's not easy to see those changes from the inside. I know that I can't say what, if anything, I changed about myself in my relationships, but I can see some changes in some of my friends and family brought on by their relationships.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Aidan loves his Daycare. He was mad for 20 minutes because we brought him home. Oh well, I'm sure he will get over it sooner or later. I got in contact with EI (Early Intervention) about his speech issues. We will probably not hear from them until the end of August because they are sort of on Holiday right now. I'm also thinking of doing Daycare myself. I don't know though. I'd like to be with Aidan until he goes to school. But I'd also like to have a job ... Oh well, I have to get a job so it doesn't really matter.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Here is a crowd shot with the girls we were there with.
There were some runners, this one had his kids with him. They came down from Odell, which is about 7 miles away.
These fighter planes flew over at 10:15 AM.
Little horses, and cute kids.
A guy on a uni-cycle. (We were at the bottom of a fairly steep hill, and were very glad he didn't fall)
An interesting old tri-cycle.
Some old planes did slow circles around town.
And a guy balanceing a kayak paddle.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Right now he is playing in the living room, I can see him through the door. He has some blocks, a long green one and a square yellow one. The yellow one looks like it is supposed to be part of a roof or something, it's not flat like the green one, it has a smaller square top. Aidan put the green one on the yellow one and tipped it back and forth, saying "Look a see-saw." He's right it does look like a see-saw.
Sunday, June 11, 2006
He loves his Thomas the Train stuff, so some of his advancements have been made concerning them. He has a wonderful memory which helps a lot. I'm waiting to get an evaluation until we have a place of our own, it seems like most of the speech therapy is done in the home, and since we are staying in the RV until Mom can sell it, and then will live in a camping trailer when she gets it, I'm a bit hesitant to have anyone like that over. I don't know, maybe I'm just being paranoid. I don't want them to get any ideas about taking Aidan away. Not that I've ever had anyone even suggest such a thing, I just worry about it.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
This is what the living room looked like during the packing process, I couldn't pack everything up, because we were still living there and needed to keep things out.
This is the stack of boxes that we took out first, they are full of the things we didn't need for existance.
The blowen out tire.
Aidan flirting with a couple of sisters at a rest stop.
Same rest stop, different girl. (I think my youngest son is going to be a ladies man. LOL)
The train at Klamath Falls. It's an old retired steam engine. Aidan thinks trains are pretty great right now. He still loves trucks and cars, and has decided that dinosaurs and dragons are cool too, but his favorite things are trains.
Our first clear view of Mount Hood. We were on I-84 leaving The Dalles.
Aidan waiting for Grandaddy at the McDonalds in Hood River. He was ready for the trip to be over. :)
I'll post some more pictures I've taken since we got here later.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
So, we made it to Hood River on May 9th. Everyone and everything survived the trip, although I was not all together sure that it would end up that way during the trip. I tried to keep some notes in my day planner on the things that happened on our epic trip home to Oregon, so here are some of them.
We still haven't left! One delay after another, including delays in loading the trailer. I almost worked myself into heat exhaustion trying to get everything packed, loaded, and cleaning up. In the end I left the place in a big mess. The truck was too heavy in the front so that the tongue almost touched the ground, we moved it anyway to a location were we could work on it without being in the street. The guys worked on it until 10 PM yesterday, they got it to work and then we decided to go to the Quality Inn n Merced for the night. I don't think I could have slept on the floor at Jimmy's, every part of my body hurt too much. It's a nice place to stay, but I was too stressed and tired to enjoy it much.
Today everything went along fine, they had the truck and trailer working together fine, but then the discovered a wiring problem so they spent a couple of hours tracking down the problem, and several more fixing it. By then it was 9PM so we went back to the Quality Inn for another night, tomorrow by noon we should be able to finally get out of here!
May 5th 7:23 PM
Well, some progress was made today. We WERE able to leave around noon. The truck is very slow because the trailer is very heavy, we can only go about 45 to 50 mph, but it goes! We stopped at Cody's, one of my brothers, and had a wonderful visit with Cody and the kids. Kelly, his wife, was sick and in bed when we were there. Then we stopped to get something to eat.
About 50 miles or so from Cody's the rear right tire on the truck BLEW OUT! I've never had a blow out before and it sacred me so much it took me almost a half an hour to stop shaking. Everything was fine, I guess I did a good job of keeping control of everything. So now we are waiting for Jimmy to come and help us. He is bring two tires so that we can change both of the rear tires. We have been here for about an hour, and will probably be here for a couple more.
Well, it took longer than we expected, Jimmy sent his sister and brother down with the tires. Howard had to change them himself without power. But it's finally done. Aidan was wonderful while waiting, he talked and playing in his carseat without giving us much trouble. We moved the truck when it got dark, because I was worried about Howard changing the tires on the shoulder of the Highway. So we were able to let Aidan walk around some. After everything was done we decided to stay at a Motel 6 for the night, it might be the best financial decision, but Howard needs to relax.
We wanted to go the coast route to Oregon, we thought it would be easier on the truck. But ... We got lost on highway 16, took a wrong turn, and ended up back on I-5. We got as far as Red Bluff before we decided to stop for the night. It was a beautiful drive, but turned into a big waste of time and gas.
We made it to Kalamath Falls. We stopped and looked at a train they have at the veterans park there. When we got back to the truck we discovered that we had a flat on the trailer. We unhooked the truck and I tried to get a tire at Wal-Mart. They didn't have the one we needed and the next closet thing, which would have worked okay, cost a lot more than I had. So I called my Dad to see what we could do. He sent us $100, which I waited around to get at Wal-Mart, and arranged for us to get a tired at Les Schwab on his account. So we are going to spend the night at a Motel, because we are not parked in a place I feel comfortable sleeping in the truck, and because I want to sleep more tonight than I did last night.
We had some more trouble with the truck, it died not long after we left Chunult (I'm not sure of the spelling). A nice man stopped and let Howard use his cell phone and we called my Dad. He talked to Howard and had him check the fuel line. It had a clog in it. We did okay but used a lot of gas. We finally discovered a leak, and then later another one. In Redmond we called my Mom and Dad again, the gas leaks had left us with no money and very little gas, so they sent another $50. We are almost there!
We spent the night in front of a little store, in a little town whose name I forget. We ran out of gas right there, the store, which had a gas station in front of it, didn't open until 8 AM. It was cold and we were very tired of the truck but we did get some sleep. After that was taken care of, and a really nice guy helped us get it started again, I guess there was an other clog in the fuel line, and then the battery was low from all the attempts to start it. We got here with almost no gas left, and had some trouble getting up the steep hill to my Parents house, but we made it! We are so happy to be home!
So, Aidan and I have been settling in here. Howard is down in Salem, looking for a job. He plans to come up for the week-end. It's been really nice to be back home. Mom and Dad are bonding with Aidan, and he loves them. Pepper, mom's dog, enjoys having Aidan around, but he gets tired of it sometimes. So Aidan is learning to leave Pepper alone when he gives him that little growl. They are doing great.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it. LOL I hope I'll be able to post more now that we have DSL here. Take Care All.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Well, I guess I'd better go get things done. I'm not sure when I'll be in Hood River, but I'll try to get on line in with an update as soon as I can. Take Care all.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
P.S. I know I used a lot of exclamation marks in this post, but I'm hormonal and it made me feel less frustrated. Really it did.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
1. Paint the fenders on the trailer.
2. Take the trailer in to get the license.
3. Pack up (I have a plan for this as well).
4. Have dinner with Howard's Cousin Jim and Aunt Martha.
5. Take the cable box in, pay the final bill.
6. Call the phone company to shut off the phone and give them my new address for the final bill.
7. Talk to the insurance people about the truck.
8. Look around for anything we forgot.
9. Get in the truck and leave!
We will stop by my brother Cody's house on the way out to see them. I think we will go the coast route because it will be a little bit easier for the truck to handle than the other ways. Besides Aidan can get his look at the ocean. So, depending on how long it takes us, how often we stop, and how slow we have to drive because of the trailer, we could be in Hood River in less than 2 weeks!
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Yesterday was a migraine day. I slept from 1:30 PM until 6:30 and still had a headache. It faded after we had dinner, but is still sitting there behind my right eye waiting. I feel like I could sleep all day today too. Of course I won't be able to do that. It's hard to describe the way I feel after a migraine. The pain is gone, but I'm still not quite back to normal. It's like a memory of the pain, or a tiredness like after a leg cramp, that feeling that if I move wrong it will come back. Anyway, today I'm in that almost back to normal phase. I hope that this afternoon it will be gone for good.
Friday, April 14, 2006
I had a dream that we were in Oregon, and it felt so good to be home. It didn't seem to be much of a rush or too much of a problem, but somehow I wasn't with Howard and Aidan. I was trying to catch up with them. I'm not sure what I was driving, or if I was with other people. It's been too long since I woke up, the details are fading. All in all it was a good dream though.
Sometimes it feels like we will never get out of here. But we have to leave the trailer park by the end of May regardless of anything else. So ... Keep good thoughts that we will be back in Oregon before Christopher's birthday on the 10th of May. I know that is almost 3 weeks away, but the way things are going it could take that long.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
I've been so sleepy the last couple of days. Before we had Aidan I used to spend days like this in bed, sleeping and maybe watching some TV or drawing. Now, of course, I have to watch Aidan, so no all day naps for me.
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
I think we will take the coast route to Oregon, because the hills are much easier and there is less chance for snow. The weather has been very wet the last few days, with lots of snow up in the mountains. They are saying that the snow level is going up though, so who knows. It will take longer going the coast route, but will be a nice drive and easier for the truck to handle, I hope.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
My list of things I'm taking with me is getting smaller all the time. I still need to get into the shed and see what is salvageable. But chances are I'll be leaving most of it here. I want to find my books, and a few other things. But I don't need most of that stuff, I've become accustomed to having it. So I'll be taking my Queen size bed (mattress, box springs, frame and headboard), Aidan's twin size bed (mattress, box springs, frame, headboard and footboard) my two dressers, the china cabinet, filing cabinet, art cabinet, a small desk, 3 small tables, a small bookcase, 2 TV's , computers, 2 lamps, microwave, various boxes of things, our cloths, Aidan's toys, and a few other small odds and ends of things.
Aidan LOVES the truck. The first night it was here he got mad when we brought him in. He wanted to sleep in it! So it has become known as "Aidan's truck". Here are a few pictures of it with Aidan playing in it today.
It's not a very pretty truck.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
I don't know what is happening with the move. I guess there is a 1978 Dodge truck that is supposed to be here any time now. It needs some work, but if the problem is what Jimmy thinks it is it won't cost much to fix it. There is also a trailer, kind of a boxed in truck bed with a roll up door, that we are also supposed to be getting soon. So ... I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high, but IF it all works out the way Jimmy says it will, it will be wonderful!
Aidan was sick a couple of days ago. It seemed like everything he had to eat or drink would come back up in just a few minutes. Twice it happened in the car, and once it happened all over me. My stomach was irritable for two days after that and then I had a day of sitting in the bathroom almost all day. Today I'm feeling pretty good, except that I'm tired. Oh and allergies, but those are normal for me around here at this time of year.
Yesterday I asked Aidan to be quiet. He has started to repeat everything anyone says. But when I told him that I didn't feel well, he came over to me, put his hand on my cheek and said "Oh, poor little Mama." It was so cute. He sounded so concerned.
Friday, March 10, 2006
He only has melt downs when he is tired, but now that he is trying to skip the afternoon nap that happens regularly. He is also starting to sleep in later. No more waking up a 5 AM, he will now sleep until 7, or once in awhile even 8.
Right now he is talking to the TV, it's the Backyardagains. He really likes them as well as Dora and Diego. Of course Sesame Street is always something he will sit still for. (Probably why he knows about Q's and triangles) During most of his "Shows" he will be playing, pretending to read, drawing, or some other activity. This is a new Backyardagains, so he is interested more than normal. The kids are having a race "around the world" they were snowboarding down a mountain and Aidan was telling them "Be careful, don't crash." He had to say it 4 times, once for each of the 4 characters that are in this adventure.
He is counting objects now. Ducks in a book, pieces of tomato, and movies in the book case. He counts in Spanish up to 7 sometimes too, thanks to Dora and Diego. I'm going to see if my Dad would mind teaching Aidan more Spanish.
He brought a stuffed toy to me with a shirt to wrap around it, then he carried it like a baby, patted it on the back and then put it to bed. It was so cute, he doesn't know any babies right now, so maybe it's just a natural nurturing part of his personality. He knows almost all his body parts, and can show them to you as well as name them. His Daddy and I are having a disagreement about the words for his behind and his penis. Howard wants to say Butt and for some strange reason feels weird saying Penis. I want to say Bottom and Penis, because I think they will be more acceptable at school when he goes. Howard doesn't think that the word Butt will get Aidan in trouble. So I guess he will learn both and I'll have to tell him not to say Butt in public places like school and the Grocery Store.
All in all I'd say that Aidan is making a good amount of progress learning things. He may still be behind kids his age in some things, but I think he is catching up fast and is actually ahead a little bit in a few others.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Here are some pictures I took of Aidan, my batteries died early, so I only got about 4 or 5 pictures.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Friday, February 24, 2006
Thursday, February 23, 2006
But there is a possible bright spot, Howard has talked to someone in CoosBay about a job. It pays about $2000 a month, gross pay. Not too bad, I think. If they like his resume he could have an interview in a couple of weeks. Coos Bay isn't my first choice of places to live, but it's better than here. It's getting depressing not knowing if will be able to leave this month or not. I'm about half packed and I don't feel very encouraged to pack any more. I could get quite a bit packed and still be able to live day to day, but I just can't seem to bring myself to do it.
I am getting rid of a lot of things, well actually I'm just going to leave them here. Maybe someone can use them. We are going to take the beds, two dressers, the china cabinet, the art cabinet, the filing cabinet, computers, cloths, Aidan's toys (although many of the older ones are not going with us), about half the dishes and pots and pans, about half the boxes of things I've been moving with us, the desk, a lamp or two, and maybe the freezer. Hopefully the trailer will be done soon and I can start to move things out there to get them out of the way. If I keep Buddy close to the trailer no one will be getting into it.
I've been feeling very tired a lot lately. I'm not sure why. But I need to fight it, and get busy around here. It's a challenge to do things like pack and clean with a busy 3 year old trying to "help" or thinking he can get away with doing things he would normally get in trouble for. He naps only half the time these days, so I can't count of that time to do things. Howard gets too involved in his computer or TV and doesn't' watch Aidan well enough (or maybe I'm just being too critical, thinking I am the ONLY one who can watch Aidan well enough).
Keep good moving vibes coming my way, okay? I don't want to have to pay rent for March.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Today my sweet little boy is 3! How did the years fly by so fast? WOW 3 years already!
Dear Little Valentines boy,
I love you so very completely. It's hard to believe you are already 3, and yet it seems as if you have been part of me forever. You are growing bigger and bigger all the time, and learning new things every day. You are talking more now days, but still not as much as what I've heard others your age are talking. You know how to make your wants known, you can tell your Daddy and I that you love us, and you have a good memory for people and their names, so I think you are doing pretty well.
You enjoy playing with computers, any computer will make you happy. You like books, trucks, cars, red things, Elmo, Cookie Monster, Grover, you cat named Ti, and your dog Buddy. You are 39 inches tall (at least as far as I can tell with the growth chart I have, when I can get you to pass by it slow enough for me to see it).
You can count to 20 with only a few skipped numbers, a few mispronounced, but you know what they mean. You like the ABC's, but refuse to say them.
You are well behaved, for a child your age, you listen to me and usually do what I tell you to do. You go to bed easily, and sleep pretty good, for your nap and at night. You are trying to skip the afternoon nap though.
I want you to know just how happy I am that you are in my life. You can make me smile when I'm in a bad mood. I don't know what I'd do without you.
Here is your birthday cake, you liked it because of the trucks. You didn't care about the candle or eating the cake however.
Happy birthday my little love!
Friday, February 10, 2006
Dear little Sister-friend,
I love you! I feel so lucky to have you in my life, even though we don't see each other very often. I wish you a day that is as special for you as you are special to me. Have fun, play, enjoy.
I love you!
Monday, February 06, 2006
It gives me some more time to go through things and pack stuff up, so maybe a blessing in disguise. If we get the trailer, and a lock, I can load some stuff up early as well.
Thursday, February 02, 2006
I'm slowly progressing with packing up those thing we don't NEED for everyday life. I am also deciding to get rid of almost half of the things I have. Some things will go in the dumpster, some will go to whoever wants them, some we might be able to sell. Of course we will have to speed things up if they come over with the money tonight. (We might have missed them yesterday, because we went around to get my Wheel of the Year photos, so we were gone for a couple of hours in the middle of the day. Then from 6 to about 8:30 we were at Denny's for dinner with Jimmy, his wife, sister and mother.)
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Thursday, January 19, 2006
So I'm pretty sure that we, Aidan and I, will be in Hood River with my Parents before summer. I'm kind of torn about it however. I have been feeling rather lonely lately. I miss my family and friends, and haven't made any friends here except for Howard's family. I also, for the first time, felt like the poor relations who are included in family gatherings only because they are family this last Holiday season. No one was mean or rude, but I felt like we didn't fit in at all. I was sad for Aidan, although he didn't notice anything, because all the other kids have Grandma's and Great-Grandma who dote on them. Aidan had only Howard and I. The other kids got presents from their Aunts and Uncles, we even gave each one a book, but Aidan didn't get anything. It's not that I think presents are important, but more that everyone else was opening presents and Aidan didn't have any. But at his age he didn't notice. If we lived some where away from any family or friends we already have I wouldn't feel so bad. Because there wouldn't be anyone to be compared to. Do you understand?
On the other hand, Aidan has a real connection to Jimmy and Buna. He loves them SO much, and he will miss them very much when we leave. I am sad that he will have to go through that, but again he just might not be bothered as much as I worry he will be. It will be easier for him now for two reasons. One, we will be moving up to my Mom and Dad's so he will have plenty of people who are "his". Two, he will be only 3 in just 26 days, so he won't remember much of it, and he's always been an easy going child. He takes change well, so I'm sure he will be fine. I still worry that he will feel sad about it though, and I know that I'll miss them myself. But in the end, I really want to move back to Oregon.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
The first has the back ground blurred a little bit.
The second is Black and White with the apple the only touch of color. The color of the apple is too dark though and I can't seem to be able to fix it.
The third has an old photo treatment done to it, sepia toned, softened a little, blurred edges, and rounded corners. You don't see the rounded corners very well except for the lower right corner.
Friday, January 06, 2006
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
The first one is the temperature at 1PM on the first. It was pouring down rain, and the wind was blowing fairly hard. It felt a lot colder than this.
The second photo is of Aidan's dinner plate. This is what we had for dinner on the first. It's a pork, potato and onion Southwestern hash, if you look really hard you can see the steam from his corn.
The third photo is the view out my bedroom window at 6PM, the little lights are about a block away.
The fourth one is of the arbor/arch in the little park down town. It's going to be covered by what I think are climbing roses in the Spring.
The fifth is of our tree, the one in the front yard. It was raining so hard I got drenched taking it.
The sixth is the Moutain range I can see from around here. They finally have snow on them. I took this today, while at the lake.
The seventh is Yosemite Lake. It had more water in it a couple of summers ago when we were there, the water came up to the concrete edge and was about 2 feet deep there. As you can see the level is quite low today. It was a very beautiful day to go to the lake today.
The eighth is my current project as is on the first. It's going to be a hat, if/when I finish it.
The ninth is the main street into the park here where I live. If you turned right here, you would see my house. Taken today to avoid standing in the rain.
The tenth is Aidan sleeping the night of the first, he wouldn't co-operate with a picture of him in front of his growth chart, so ...
The eleventh is an Orchard over in Winton, not far from here. I don't know what kind of trees these are, maybe peach. I took this today. After all the rain it was almost a perfect day.
The twelfth, is a local construction site, I took this on the third while it was still raining.