Thursday, January 19, 2006


It seems possible that we will be moving back to Oregon next month. We need to come up with $2000 for the move. We might have this old house sold for $1500, and we will have the other $500 on the third. But, the lady who MIGHT buy the house has to talk her daughter into moving into it. And from what Howard said the Daughter is reluctant at best. I might be able to sell my car for $2000, but I'd rather keep it if possible. If we can't sell the house this month, I guess we will just have to wait until March. I'll pay as little as possible on the bills in February and save every penny I can. Hopefully Howard and work enough for Jimmy to get the rest of what we will need.

So I'm pretty sure that we, Aidan and I, will be in Hood River with my Parents before summer. I'm kind of torn about it however. I have been feeling rather lonely lately. I miss my family and friends, and haven't made any friends here except for Howard's family. I also, for the first time, felt like the poor relations who are included in family gatherings only because they are family this last Holiday season. No one was mean or rude, but I felt like we didn't fit in at all. I was sad for Aidan, although he didn't notice anything, because all the other kids have Grandma's and Great-Grandma who dote on them. Aidan had only Howard and I. The other kids got presents from their Aunts and Uncles, we even gave each one a book, but Aidan didn't get anything. It's not that I think presents are important, but more that everyone else was opening presents and Aidan didn't have any. But at his age he didn't notice. If we lived some where away from any family or friends we already have I wouldn't feel so bad. Because there wouldn't be anyone to be compared to. Do you understand?

On the other hand, Aidan has a real connection to Jimmy and Buna. He loves them SO much, and he will miss them very much when we leave. I am sad that he will have to go through that, but again he just might not be bothered as much as I worry he will be. It will be easier for him now for two reasons. One, we will be moving up to my Mom and Dad's so he will have plenty of people who are "his". Two, he will be only 3 in just 26 days, so he won't remember much of it, and he's always been an easy going child. He takes change well, so I'm sure he will be fine. I still worry that he will feel sad about it though, and I know that I'll miss them myself. But in the end, I really want to move back to Oregon.

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